As I entered the process of this painting, the theme being a tree, the tree of knowledge, I started out with a very abstract representation of what a tree felt like to me. The feeling and results were exciting and freeing but it left me flat. There was more for me to unveil and revisit and grow from. I stuggled with it for some time! I continually thought, (which is my first mistake) I should be and paint one way and turn my back on truth. Why is it so hard to face truth? Why am I not good enough to be strong in my truth and live in it?...Slowly I let go, and I mean slowly! I fought and fought what was calling me and showing up right infront of me! I find the answers are always right there for me! Spirit is always in my work and she (me) shows me in vivid detail what it is I am to do! How cool is that, right?!!! It is cool when I listen, most of the time I don't and continue on MY course of pain and believing the lies which causes more pain!
When I decide and it IS a decision, to let go and let God, or what or whom ever you want to call the higher power, then the magic happens. Things turn and churn and teach, teach me! The truth always comes to the surface somehow and some way. Truth tugs and tugs, gives signs and creates opportunities for us to learn. She never lets go until we see it and then the ahh moments come in and I laugh because it didnt have to be that difficult, it wouldn't be that difficult if I choose to see and listen in the first place.
This painting sat on my wall for about 2 weeks before I knew how it had to finish. I looked at it everyday knowing that more needed to be said and revealed but I didnt want to see it. I didnt want to believe it so I pushed it away. The swan was the final peice of this lesson, and of course I wasnt going to listen to that lesson. Here is what I have read about Swans, Grace doesn’t mean only the ability to live a balanced life, it is also being able to be at home in many planes of reality, to see that we are more than we appear to be - we are both physical and spiritual beings. We are souls having a human experience.
Not only does the swan reveal to you your own inner beauty, but also that of others. A Swans graceful entering into your life signals a time of altered states of awareness and the development of intuitive abilities, for those with this medicine have the inherent ability to see the future, and to accept the healing and change that is starting in their lives. Accept this and it will help you go with the flow. Listen to your inner knowledge and intuitions and Swan will work through you. The Swan's voice teaches the mysteries of song and poetry, for these touch our inner child and also our inner beauty. http://www.shamanicjourney.com/article/6089/swan-power-animal-symbol-of-inner-grace-balance-commitment You can read more on the link I pasted in.
So the lesson has appeared and now it is time to let it into my roots and come up through my trunk and shoot out from my branches! Please pick the flowers that grow off of me, they are not mine to keep. oxoxo
Below I attached images of my painting in process!
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